We all have been guilty of or have been victim of the following Don'ts and in these actions we severely hinder the growth of self-esteem in our children.

1. Raise a child with no rules, no structure or boundaries.
2. Compare a child to their sibling or another child. "Why can't you be more like your brother?" Making a child feel like he/she's not good enough.
3. Teaching a child that they are bad.  Children are not bad.  They may misbehave or exhibit inappropriate behaviour.  Their actions may be described as bad but not the child.
4. Ridicule or humiliate the child.
5. Physical violence or threatening a child with it.
6. Trying to control a child by shame or guilt.
7. Diminish your child's feelings. "Don't be silly" or "It's not that bad" and "Boy's don't cry".

Now there are many more "Don'ts in Parenting" but these are just a few in regards to our children's self-esteem. It's never too late to change our behavioural patterns and stop the cycle from continuing from generation to generation.

I have just touched on the subject of self-esteem and it goes much deeper than what I have summarized so I would recommend the following resources for a deeper insight on the subject.

• Between Parent and Child by Haim Ginott
• Parent Effectiveness Training by Thomas Gordon
• What to Say When You Talk to Yourself by Shad Helmstetter
• Parents Do Make a Difference by Michele Borba